Jun 24, 2009

The one that got away, the one that got away, the one that got away

Our friends at the classy news publication USA Today suggested that saving a penalty spot kick is the ninth hardest thing to do in sport; behind riding in the Tour de France, running a marathon and pole vaulting to name a few. The difficulty rating is clearly backed up by a study completed by Professor Bob Gustavson of John Brown University in Siloam USA, who found that during the 2002 MLS season 70.5% of penalties resulted in goals.
If you think about it, the kick is taken 12 yards from the keeper and depending on the speed of the shot; the keeper has around 0.25-0.50 of a second to react, move in the right direction and save the shot. I think you’d have a better chance of winning lotto, or Australia hosting the 2018 World Cup.
You can’t argue with statistics, but I wonder if somewhere in this world there was an instance where three penalties were missed in one game? Well it seems so; Argentinean striker Martin Palermo (
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FD93d2Blkhc ) now has company in this exclusive group, AC Malvern’s own Steve (Pen) Cresswell.
Below is a guideline for those wanting to know how to score a penalty:


Anyway, on with the match report where the details will become more apparent. Today’s opponent, and hopefully victim, was long time foe St Kevin’s. Previous battles with the all whites from south of the Yarra have usually been a balanced affair with St Kevin’s marginally holding the upper hand over the years.

The game had been shifted to the “fortress” that is Central Park, as the private school lads were without a home ground. This was something that disappointed the Malvern boys as it’s a venue they haven’t tasted victory at since round one against Caulfield.

Malvern controlled much of early going with some great balls played forward to the duo of Hendo and Ralpha, however brilliant keeping and defensive work would denying them a result. Then as Hendo made a run into the box he was taken down and the “State 1” referee had no hesitation tooting on his whistle and pointing to the spot.

The trusty “I’ve never missed in my entire career” Cresswell stepped up and thundered the ball toward the right hand side of the goal. Then, from nowhere; was it a bird or a plane? Nope it was a 7ft Irish git dressed in green with an insane appetite for saving penalties, which he did. The ball deflected back into play and with [insert name here] on the end of it about to score when a stupid tackle takes him to ground. Once again “Mr State 1” blows on whistle and points to the spot for another penalty and importantly a chance for redemption.

With AC’s hearts in their collective mouth’s Steve stepped up and on this occasion opted for precision over power, he struck the ball toward the left corner. The sighs of a painful miss as the ball went past the left post could be heard far and wide. St Kev’s couldn’t believe there luck and AC couldn’t buy a goal.

With less than a minute left in the half an errant tackle outside the SKEV’s box results in a free kick. The seasoned SKEV’s veteran stepped up and curled the ball around the wall and past the keeper for the first goal of the game; 0-1……..

HALF TIME

The AC rooms were very quiet and no-one would dare mention the unfortunate events of earlier. Everybody and I mean everybody felt for Steve at this point and hoped his luck would turn. His on-field performance was a display of dominance, potentially a man of the match thus so far. Not even that was enough to change his mood.

Again the in the second half AC were dominant and despite some flurries forward, one in which Zoolander knocked the ball away from Hendo mid juggle, no resulting goal came their way.

Soon enough Hendo picked the ball up down the left wing, skinned his player took the ball to the goal line and whipped a hard and low cross into the box and awaiting Pete had the ball delivered to his feet. Though marked heavily by a defender, Pete trapped the ball, did a 180 turn, stepped inside the dizzy defender and with the deftest of touch from the outside of his boot slotted the goal. Like a rabbit across a field he charged for the corner post and emulated the celebrations of Cahill, pictured right. Pete now has a firm grip on best goal celebration with a boot shine earlier in the season and boxing Pete today; 1-1.

With minutes to go another Malvern player was taken down in the box, and once again Mr State 1 pointed to the spot. Redemption is near…….A nervous Steve again stepped up and this time opted for power. The pall was struck with ferocious power to the right; and AGAIN the lanky Irish keeper somehow lunged and saved the goal. Three missed opportunities, but no other player from AC could have done any better and the keeper was definitely their saviour and man of the match.
AC would have to settle for a draw, but its better than a loss……...I guess.

Some other greats have missed penalties in there career far more important than the ones today; Baggio in the World Cup, Lampard in the Champions League Final and even Viduka’s miss nearly cost Australia a World Cup birth in 2006. To make Steve feel better, here are some of the worst penalties caught on camera:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIaby1-pf0k

AC Malvern 1-1 St Kevins
Petey
AC's nemesis